Kudala lalaziswa futhi luhlonishwa usiko kakhulu. Lokhu kwakuhlanganisa indlela yokuphile, imikhuba eyenziwayo endaweni, indlela abantu abakhuluma ngayo nababizana ngayo njalonjalo. Lapha sibheka indlela ekufanele kubizwe ngayo umuntu wesifazane otholele umntwana ekhaya noma othole umntwana engaganile. Umuntu ongaganile ufana nengane yasekhaya ngoba usuke esengaphansi kwesandla sabazali bakhe. Ukuthola umntwana kwakungasho ukuthi umuntu usengene ebudaleni obuthile, wayeqhubeka nezinto ekulindeleke ukuthi azenze ekhaya njengomuntu wesifazane.
Esikhathini sanamuhla siyabona izinto eziningi zishintsha ekuhlaleni. Njengokuthi namuhla umuntu uzalela ekhaya uthole ebizwa ngokuthi umama kanozibani. Bathi abadala lomkhuba awulungile futhi ezikhathini zakudala kwakungenziwa nhlobo lokhu. Umuntu wayeqhubeka abizwe ngegama lakhe aliqanjwe abazali bakhe hhayi ngokuthi usengunina kasibanibani. Wonke umuntu endaweni kufanele aqhubeke negama lakho. Lokhu kwakwenzelwa ukuthi umuntu angakhohlwa ukuthi usahlala ngaphansi kwesandla sabazali bakhe naye usengumntwana ekhaya. Ngokwesintu kuthiwa umuntu otholele ingane ekhaya engagananga leyongane ngeyakubo noma ingaphansi kwesandla sabazali bakhe.
Yinye kuphela indawo lapho umuntu ayebizwa ngokuthi ngunina kasibanibani kuyona. Uma evakashe kubo kwengane leyo. Noma ngabe awuganile kumele bangakubizi ngegama lakho. Uma bekubiza ngegama lakho basuke bentshengisa ukukweya. Kukholelwa ukuthi uma bekubiza ngegama lakho nabaphansi bayakweya lapho uzalele khona. Uma bengakubizi ngegama lengane yakho kumele ukuthi bakuqambe igama abazokwazi ukukubiza ngalo emzini kuphela. Awubizwa ngalo kini ubizwa emzini noma lapho uzalele khona ingane kuphela. Kini bakubiza ngegama owaqanjwa lona uzalwa abazali bakho.
Uma usuganile ubizwa ngaliphi igama
Uma umuntu eseganile ubizwa ngegama likababa wakhe omzalayo njengokuthi uma umuntu ezalwa kwaKhumalo kuthiwe nguMaKhumalo. Basuke lapho betshengisa ukuhlonipha. Kubalula uma bekubiza ngegama likababa wakho ngoba kwesinye isikhathi kusuke kuvuswa isibongo sakini. Uma kuvuswa isibongo sakini kusuke kwenzelwa ukuthi singafi isibongo sakini. Ngoba njengoba usuganile usuke uzothatha isibongo salapho uganele khona.
Lendlela yokubizwa komuntu yayenzela ukuthi umuntu ahlukaniseke ukuthi ukusiphi isigaba kulowomuzi. Umuntu wakhona ubizwa ngegama kuthi ozalisiwe kulowomuzi abizwe ngomama kasibanibani. Nabo abangasekho kwakunenkolelo yokuthi bayezwa lapho bekhona kwenzelwa nabo ukuthi bazi ukuthi abantu bangobani emagcekeni abo. Ezindaweni ezisemadolobheni nezasemaphandleni ziningi izinto ezingafani ngokwenziwa. Emadolobheni sekwenziwa izinto ngendlela yesimanje abantu abasanandaba nokuthi ingaba umthelela onjani kwabangasekho. Kubalulekile ukuthi abantu bazazi ukuthi bangobani futhi bavelaphi ngoba ukungahloniphi amasiko nemikhuba umuntu akhule ngayo kungaba umthelela ongemuhle.
English Summary
In this article we are looking at how to address a girl that has given birth outside of wedlock. Nowadays, they will call this young woman ‘mother of so and so’, in the olden days this was a taboo. A woman should be called by her first name by her family members and neighbours because she is still considered a child since she is not married. Only when she visits her boyfriend’s home that she can be called ‘mother of so and so’. The was mainly done because of not wanting to confuse the ancestors for the new addition in the family of the boy and from her home they also considered her as a child so when her name changes it is believed that ancestors cannot recognise her.
By: Nqobile Mdabe