Indlela Yokuziphatha Yakuqala Neyamanje Kubantu Besifazane

Indlela yokuphila iyashintsha ihambisane nokushintsha kwesikhathi, lokhu kusho ukushintsha indlela abantu abagqoka ngayo, abaphila ngayo, abenza ngayo izinto, ukuziphatha njalonjalo. Zimbalwa zona izinto ekuthiwa zintsha ezenzekayo esikhathini samanje ekuphileni kwabantu njengogesi, amakhompyutha njalonjalo. Isikompilo liyashintsha nalo lihambisane nezikhathi. Kulendaba sizobheka noma sizoqhathanisa izikhathi ezimbili ezahlukene ekuphileni kwabantu sigxile kakhulu kwisikompilo lokuvusa umuzi.

Uma kukhulunywa ngokuvusa umuzi kungaba yilapho umuntu wesilisa eganwa ezoqhubeka nesibongo sikayise, athole izingane ikakhulukazi zabafana ezizoqhubeka nesibongo sikayise. Okunye ukuvusa umuzi yilapho emndenini kunesimo mhlawumbe izelamani kukhona ongabatholi abantwana ebe eseganiwe, lapho kuthathwa umfowabo ukuthi ahlangane nomakoti walowo onenkinga ukuze kuvuke umuzi kamfowabo. Lapha senza isibonelo sabesilisa kodwa kwakwenzeka nowesifazane angabatholi abantwana bese kulandwa udadewabo ukuthi azogana kulowomuzi ukuvusa umuzi kadadewabo.

Ziningi ezinye izimo ezazenzeka ezaziholela ekutheni kugcine sekunengane engazalwa umuntu oqondene nalowo osuke eganiwe njengokusebenzela kude nekhaya kuthi owesilisa womndeni osele abheke bonke abesifazane abasele ekhaya. Kubalulekile ukucacisa ukuthi lomkhuba kwakuba yimfihlo yomndeni wonke ukuze uvikeleke.

Esikhathini sakudala
Okubalulekile okwakwenzeka ukuthi uma kugcine kuholele esimweni lapho umakoti ezolala nomfowabo wasemzini laba bantu babengathathwa njengabantu abanobudlelwane bokuthandana. Kwakusuke kwaziwa inhloso yokuhlangana kwabo. Futhi lokhu kwakuba yimfihlo yomndeni noma yabantu abakhethekile emndenini ukuthi kwenzekile lokho phakathi kwalabo ababili. Ingane leyo ezotholakala lapho izokhula yazi ukuthi abazali bayo yilabo ehlala nabo. Sixoxe nogogo (ongathandanga ukuthi siveze igama lakhe lapha kuloluhlelo) ositshele ukuthi yena wayengabatholi abantwana enomnakwabo othola abantwana ababegane emzini owodwa naye.

Uthi umyeni wakhe wayesebenza eGoli. Kwathi umyeni wakhe esanda kuhamba ukubuyela eGoli, kwafika umfowabo wendoda yakhe evakashile washiya inkosikazi yakhe isikhulelwe. Uthe esekhulelwe kwaba yimfihlo yabo ukuthi akekho omunye umuntu ozokwazi ukuthi ukhulelwe. Bavumelana njengomndeni ukuthi ingane kuzoba eyakhe ngoba yena wayengabatholi abantwana. Ngenhlanhla nesikhathi ekwenzeka ngaso lokhu yayisandla kuvakasha indoda yakhe ekhaya. Uthi basifihla isisu samnakwabo waze wateta uthe esetetile wathatha ingane kwaba ngeyakhe. Leyongane isanda kwazi ngoba isindala futhi itshelwa omunye umuntu womndeni ukuthi akazali kodwa nje uthi ingane yakhengenhlanhla yakhe ingane leyo ayimzondanga ngalesosenzo sakhe, futhi ukuba ayizange ilazi iqiniso namanje ngabe akayitshelanga.

Bakhona abanye abasebenzisa lomkhuba ukugila imikhuba ekungafanele ngabe bayayenza njengokuthi balale namakhosikazi abafowabo ukufeza izinkanuko zabo okugcina sekuhlukanise umndeni. Ngoba ziyaxoxwa nezimo lapho ngisho nobabezala kwakutholakala ukuthi uyalala nomakoti wakwakhe.

Isikhathi sanamuhla
Sekuyinsakavula isidwaba samakoti ukuzwa izindaba lapho amandotmbazane andawonye kuthiwa abanga indoda eyodwa noma umakoti ukhishwe udadewabo emendweni wakhe. Futhi sekwaba yimfashini ukuthi kwaziwe endaweni ukuthi intombazane yakwasibanibani inamasoka amaningi. Lokhu kwakungekho ezikhathini zakudala. Nokuthi imfihlo abasenayo abantu abaphila kulesikhathi sanamuhla. Kufana namantombazane aganele ndawonye aseyancintisana ngokuthi ubani ongcono awasekani ezinkingeni ababhekana nazo njengomndeni. Lokhu kubonakala ngokuthi uma kukhona ongazali kuyiwa ezindaweni ezihlala izingane ezingenabani ukuthi umuntu athole umntwana azomkhulisa njengowakhe kunokuba ngabe bayasizana njengabantu besibongo esisodwa.

English Summary
In this article we compare two eras where in the olden days co-wives or sister wives it can be by marrying in polygamous marriage or by marrying brothers would look after each other. For instance when one wife can’t bear children, the other wife would be a surrogacy and give the other her child. This also happens if it is a man that can’t bear children where his brother would sleep with his wife to assist his brother. This act was kept as a secret within the family. Nowadays, young brides or wives are competing against each other. And there are cases where you hear stories of sisters taking each other’s husbands. And what is important was that in the olden days it was a disgrace for a woman to have more than one partner which today is done openly and women can justify why they are doing it.

By: Nqobile Mdabe

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